Out of the estimated 4 million people who suffer from W.A.D. most of these cases go untreated. This of course presents a huge problem to would-be W.A.D. therapists, who all too often become victims of the disorder that they know so well. "I would open up my own practice, but I'm averse to doing [explicative deleted] so because the patients are averse to working...at jobs, on their problems...working at all really," Larry Yonkerbluff WAD MD explains. "I've got the potential to make a lot of money and be really busy, but I think I'm going to take some Improv classes until the WADERS come out of the water," Yonkerbluff adds.
Sadly, Dr. Yonkerbluff's story is a common one. Just like the ornithologist who tries to fly and eat worms and the crime investigator who eventually becomes a crime scene, W.A.D. specialists are what they eat...Highly capable, yet jobless slobs.
Wednesday, July 2, 2008
Monday, June 30, 2008
Do I have WAD?
The following is a list of common WAD symptoms. Please review this list to see if you are a WADER.
WAD SYMPTOMS
Do You...
1. Weep frequently and uncontrollably?
2. Find yourself in a fetal position in your standing shower?
3. Go shopping and say to yourself, "I could use always use a new tie...for my...meetings...with clients...and such."
4. Not understand the difference between Friday and Tuesday?
5. Pack your lunch, but ultimately end up eating it while still wearing your bathrobe?
Even gainfully employeed individuals can suffer from WAD. If you currently have a job, please answer the following.
Do You...
1. Mutter ill-will upon yourself after speaking with co-workers?
2. Sit in bathroom stalls for extended periods regardless of digestive urges?
3. End sales calls by saying "Eh, It's all good, man."?
4. Have a notebook filled with tally marks?
5. Try to convince yourself that you could be attracted to co-workers who, in any other circumstance would be considered mildly ugly to plain looking.
WAD SYMPTOMS
Do You...
1. Weep frequently and uncontrollably?
2. Find yourself in a fetal position in your standing shower?
3. Go shopping and say to yourself, "I could use always use a new tie...for my...meetings...with clients...and such."
4. Not understand the difference between Friday and Tuesday?
5. Pack your lunch, but ultimately end up eating it while still wearing your bathrobe?
Even gainfully employeed individuals can suffer from WAD. If you currently have a job, please answer the following.
Do You...
1. Mutter ill-will upon yourself after speaking with co-workers?
2. Sit in bathroom stalls for extended periods regardless of digestive urges?
3. End sales calls by saying "Eh, It's all good, man."?
4. Have a notebook filled with tally marks?
5. Try to convince yourself that you could be attracted to co-workers who, in any other circumstance would be considered mildly ugly to plain looking.
If you or any of your friends suffer from WAD, please contact your local WAD Control team.
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